Back in 2012, in the good ol’ days when I blogged more than once a year...ahem....I remember reading one of my favorite bloggers sharing she would set a word as the theme for her year. I thought-- what a great idea-- and went with it. I haven’t been perfect with it every year since then, but looking back, I really love how a chosen word has inspired and pushed me through a year. Two of the first words I chose were joy and hope, which ended up being two qualities I needed most those two years and in the years to come. In contrast, last year I chose the word uplift, and had all these ideas on how I could serve others and make the world a brighter place. That all seemed great in the hopeful month of January, but in February my life took a sharp left turn when my father’s health suddenly and rapidly declined; and then life decided to go completely off-road into uncharted territory when my much-loved father passed away at the end of May. I had wanted to lift and brighten, but most of the year I found myself in the lowest and darkest places I had ever known. Instead of glorying in all that -I- could do, I watched in awe of what those around me could do. Uplift was definitely a theme for the last year, but not in the way I planned it. I learned how it feels to be lifted up from the depths of grief, only to sink back down again—and still have loving hands reaching down towards me, helping me through each step, waiting with me until I was ready.
I learned that even when we are at our lowest, we can still find ways to love others and serve them. In fact, when we are hurting, sometimes the best thing we can do is look outside ourselves. Love is not a commodity to be hoarded by misers. That precious little we feel we have left within us doesn’t disappear when we share it; it multiplies and fills us back up. And in the end, love is what lifts our heavy hearts.
As I was reflecting on what I most wanted for this next year, all I could think was how much I would like for things to SLOW DOWN. I can’t remember feeling so overwhelmed and inadequate and just plain tired in a long, long time. Last year, I had a New Years Resolutions list that was six pages long (no joke). The very thought makes me cringe. This year I am going to SIMPLIFY. I want all the extra distractions of life to fall away, so that I can focus on the things that really matter. First and foremost would be spending time and making memories with my loved ones. One thing I have thought about often since my father’s passing was how even though his life was so much shorter than it should have been, he made every moment count. He left a mark and an example for each and every one of his friends and family. We don’t know if we’ll be on this earth for another 50 years or if this is our last. I don’t want my time to be wasted. So 2018 is for making memories and treasuring those simple moments.
With an eye to simplicity, I only allowed myself to set two resolutions this year:
1. Be healthy.
2. Finish my novel
Of course I have smaller goals and plans on how to accomplish these, but (without sounding too melodramatic), I already feel weight and pressure lifting from me and it is freeing! While I still feel tired, I also feel ready to move forward. And after all the hiding I have done in the last year, it's about time.
Happy New Year! May this year be kind to us. And even if it isn't, let's carry on.
I’ve noticed that the word-of-the-year idea gets a bigger following each year. What’s your word and why?
My Past Words:
2012 joie de vivre (french phrase that means "joy of living")
2013 hope
2014 gratitude
2015 ——
2016 ——
2017 uplift
2018 simplify
[pictures taken January 3, 2018 on the Old Pali Highway Trail, Oahu]
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